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Stallone's Worst Film
So at the store last week and along with getting Avengers Endgame on Blu Ray I noticed a pretty new action/thriller with Sylvester Stallone and Matthew Modine called Backtrace. But you know something is wrong when the film is less than a year old and the Blu Ray is already in the bargain bin. The film is just a very boring mess that run 82 minutes (without credits) and still could have been at least 20 minutes shorter.
The plot has a thief (Matthew Modine) and a few other criminals getting shot down by their partners. Modine survives but looses his memory. Seven years later 3 people break him out of a high security facility and put experimental drugs in him. Most of the film is watching Modine have painful flashbacks and looking for bags of money. We get some scenes of Stallone in random cop exposition scenes. But most of the film is just boring scenes of them looking for bags of money. Very little happens in the film. There is two shootout scenes but nothing that exciting. The whole film lacks in every department especially in character development. This is Stallones worst work.
Cries of the Unborn (2017)
First off Im always on the look out for the bizarre, disturbing and most controversial films I can find. I dont think I can top this one. And oddly enough it stars the late Robert Loggia! Well kinda. He is advertised in the film but it all footage from another film.
The film is called Cries of the Unborn which is a semi sequel to The Life Zone. The film makes zero sense in contrast to the first film and leaves many errors in the film as it stands. The Film has a 1.3 on IMDB as of now. Anything above a 1 is too high. So what makes this film so messed up? The film is about a group of people who kidnapped a young woman who was going to have an abortion. Now on trail the group has admitted their crime. Why this is a trial after the confession I do not know. The jury on the trial talks the case out and watches footage from the kidnapping (made up of footage from The Life Zone). Also they mentally toured her and inspected her area. and debate if the kidnappers should be set free. Here is where it gets twisted. Regardless on your feelings on abortion this film makes a deliberate statement and message that kidnapping a person is alright in this circumstance. They also try to justify what they did. Again they abducted a woman for 7 months and mentally tortured her. And this film actually takes the side of the abductors! Cries of the Unborn: The film that says kidnapping is perfectly fine in certain circumstances.
This is one the craziest most damaging films imaginable. Im ranking this as the second worst film I have ever seen.
Pet Sematary (2019)
Nothing redeeming in this remake.
This is one of the worst remakes I have ever seen. I really hated this film. Its just a very generic redo that is not scary or even amusing.
The 1989 film has so much more going for it. It was much more creepier and had a great tension through the whole film. Its generally freaky. The new one has none of that. I felt it was just a quick cash in of Stephen Kings material. I could not find a thing I liked about it. The original had a firm grip on the deal of death and the loss of a loved one. It felt much more powerful and real than this this film. This film seemed to lack the emotion the original had. Plus I felt John Lithgow was pretty miscast as Jud Crandle. The whole film I felt nothing for. Just another generic remake with nothing I can find thats reedeeming or positive I can say about this.
Escape Plan: The Extractors (2019)
An OK action film. Nothing more.
Simply put its watchable but nothing that good. Its a cheap looking direct to DVD generic action film. It has a simple rescuing hostages plot that makes the film a breaking into prison film rather than breaking out. Stallone and Dave Bautista do what they can with the material. 50 Cent is advertised as a lead but is only in it for 5 minutes or so. The thing I got a kick out of is the run time. Take out the end credits and the opening logos and the film only runs about 75 minutes. The end credits go very slow and put little bits of the film in there to boost the run time to 88 minutes.
The Poison Rose (2019)
Pass on this Poison
Well this was lame. Its the new John Travolta/Morgan Freeman film that went direct to DVD/Blu Ray. It was trying to be an old fashioned mystery/Noir film but lacks anything that would make that kind of film work. Its not mysterious, well written, interesting or entertaining. Just one of those P.I. trying to solve a case films. Travolta looks bizarre in this grey beard he has. Freeman is fine but hes just there for a quick paycheck obviously. Famke Janssen sadly looks really weird and puffy in the face. She must of had some work done. Dont know why she was beautiful. The only saving grace in this film comes from Brendan Fraser who plays a nutty doctor in charge of a psych ward. The film should have been about him. So unless you want to see Travolta take out an assassin by throwing a football directly in his face I would advise against seeing this film. Hell I think Battlefield Earth is a better film. Sure its really bad but its still more amusing than Poison Rose.
Dragged Across Concrete (2018)
Almost good but destroyed by an odd pace.
So I saw Dragged Across Concrete and a good amount of it I really enjoyed. I like the cast. I thought Mel Gibson and Vince Vaughn were good. I liked the plot. The villains are good. And the film is well crafted.
But seriously what the hell was with the pace of this film? I heard of slow burn films but this is just ridiculous. A slow film is fine but after a while I felt we were just stalling to get the run time as close to 3 hours as we can. Theres a point where it just gets boring and tedious. I guess there are people who like that and of course thats fine but I figure most people would like a fast or at least well paced film. Also there is subplot with Jennifer Carpenter where she does not want to leave her baby to go to work and the result is her getting killed right after they establish her character. Did not know what that had to do with anything or what the point of that was.
A real mixed bag here.
Death Factory (2002)
Fun low budget horror.
Death Factory is about a group of young people hanging out in an old abandoned factory but there is a deformed young woman with blades on her fingers slashing them up one by one. Its simple but if you like low budget slashers then I would recommend it.
Hell's Highway (2002)
Good low budget horror.
Hell's Highway is about four young people on a road trip who pick up a young woman named Lucinda. They soon find out that Lucinda is an evil woman who kills people along the highway. They try to stay clear of her and to stay alive. Its a film from Brain Damage cinima who specializes in low budget horror. This is one of their best films.
Right to Believe (2014)
Bigoted and very dull. One of the worst films imaginable.
Right To Believe is about a reporter that has to do a report on Gay Pride Day. Instead of covering the story by interviewing a parade organizer and writing the story like he is supposed to it turns into a debate between religion and homosexuality. Why would anyone want to make or be involved with this junk film? Its a anti gay propaganda film thats not only highly bigoted its very boring as well. One of the worst films I have ever seen.
One of the worst movies ever made.
Audacity is a horrible, mean and really bigoted film that is disguised to be loving. There is no love here. Its just an insulting mess of almost hour long film. Made by infamous evangelical Ray Comfort and the Living Waters team you know you are going to get some awful propaganda. The film is about a bike messenger named Peter who has a dream about lesbians dying in an elevator. The film is unclear where the dream began though. After that Peter is uneasy about gay people. He goes on a mission to be anti gay and to warn people that being gay is wrong because he is Christian. Note in real life not all Christians are anti gay. After saving a gay couple in an attempted store robbery he gets invited out to dinner by a gay couple. Peter acts like a jerk and basically tells them how awful it is to be gay. Are we supposed to like Peter? There is also a subplot about Peter doing stand up but that goes nowhere. Audacity is a awful film that is proud to be bigoted film. I can not understand why anyone would like this film. Its absolute garbage with not the slighted redeeming thing about it. Why would anyone participate in this mess? One of the worst films ever made.
The Trump Prophecy (2018)
One of the worst films ever created.
I want everyone to know Im doing this from an unbiased standpoint. Im not looking at this film for or against Donald Trump. Im simply looking at it as a film.
I first heard about this film on Brad Jones Midnight Screenings. He later put it in a Cinema Snob review. It was also featured in God Awful Movies podcast. Naturally I got curious.
So what is The Trump Prophecy? The film claims to be a true story but Im just going to say no to that. Mark Taylor is a firefighter who is about to retire. However he is suffering from PTSD and has night terrors. He starts to dream of a demon who apparently is trying to silence him. His terrors get worse. He seeks professional help. One doctor he goes to puts him on meds. Up until this point this film has just been very boring. Now it gets crazy. Another doctor he goes to shows his wife the journals he made. Apparently he wrote about how God wanted Donald Trump to be elected because he woke up after a demon dream and saw Trump on TV and this was in 2011. The doctors wife actually takes all of this seriously. She call people to get to support Trump for the presidential election. She gets people to have prayer conference calls and blow on rams horns. One scene has her going into a plane bathroom and freaking out the passengers with her prayers. All of this comes off as crazy as it sounds. After the film there is a music video. Just when you think the end credits will come up there is another 20 minutes of movie. Its interviews with people like Michelle Bachman. I was pretty much tuned out by this point.
Basically this film is as insane as it sounds. The film says nothing about why Trump would be a good presidential candidate or why we should vote for him. Just that we should because God wants us to because a guy dreamed about a demon silencing him. This is seriously one of the worst films I have ever seen in my life. Also rumor has it that this film was worked on by Liberty University students who did not want to work of it.
River Runs Red (2018)
Bland revenge flick.
Was at my local movie/music store and found a Blu Ray River Runs Red. Pretty new film so I picked it up. It stars George Lopez, John Cusack, Taye Diggs and Luke Hemsworth. Its pretty interesting because I recall looking this up on IMDB when it cam out in November and it had around 7.7 or so. Now its down to a 5.0.
The film is about a judge whos son is murdered by two cops who thought he was going for a gun. They frame him by planting one on him. The first hour of the film is family drama. Its something you could find on the Lifetime channel. Nothing special. The last third of the film becomes a revenge action film. The action is done pretty well for what its worth. Its just really odd to see George Lopez in this kind of film doing action scenes. And actually hes pretty good in it. The film as a whole is just a very generic exorcise in drama and revenge. Its so basic that it comes off rather dull. John Cusack is just there pretty much. Hes a cop friend that helps out. I noticed in one scene as he looks over documents they dont show his face but you hear his voice. Odd use of a double. And lastly why is this film called River Runs Red? There is no river.
Better just to stick with Death Wish or John Wick. River Run Red is just bland.
Suing the Devil (2011)
Suing the Devil is a 2011 film staring and produced by Malcolm McDowell. Its a film that actually sounds like it could be odd fun. Malcolm McDowell is a damn fine actor and does what he can in this film. Its like Jack Nicholson in The Witches of Eastwick or Al Pachino in The Devil's Advocate. Its that kind of Devil. McDowell looks like hes having a blast playing the Devil. The film also stars Corbin Bernsen and Tom Sizemore. Tom Sizemore is also fun to watch. Its because its a good performance its because it looks like he is fighting off sleeping pills. It looks like hes close to passing out every scene hes in.
The thing is despite the fun performance, this movie is awful. The film is about a law student who gets mad at Satan and and whats to sue him for 8 trillion dollars. As dumb as that sounds Satan himself shows up with his team of lawyers to defend himself. The film almost has a good conversation but it either changes the subject or gives an awful answer. This could have had some really creative and good dialog about religion or evil but it takes the easy way out. No creativity allowed here. Its about as basic as you can get. Its get really boring fast and then turns into horrible propaganda. It left me feeling down. As if the propaganda part was no bad enough the lead actor who plays the lawyer (Bart Bronson) is a horrible actor and gives a horrible performance. Bad acting does not usually bother me but this one did. That is saying something. Its really a bad film. Its like Saturday Night Live skit that goes on for too long and gets old fast.
Good cast. OK film.
I dont recall hearing about this film which is odd because it has a great cast. Kevin Spacey, Morgan Freeman, Dylan McDermott, LL Cool J, John Heard, Cary Elwes, Justin Timberlake and Piper Perabo all star.
The thing is the film is just very generic. Its a basic corrupt cop film. The bad cops are being found out of the their correction by a young journalist played by a horribly miscast Justin Timberlake. Basically the film is OK. Not good not bad just OK. Plus this film was a straight to DVD release although it did go to theaters overseas. I figure Freeman being in it alone would give it somewhat of a better release but then again he was in Guilty By Suspicion another direct to DVD film and that was way worse.
No Greater Love (2010)
Possibly the worst romantic drama ever made.
Alright so I guess its no surprise to anyone that Im not a fan of romance or romantic comedies so granted this was not my type of film. Still I like to see a little bit of everything and sometimes I get something good. I checked out a film called No Greater Love from 2010. I was curioues because I heard a review of it and the reviewer said it was pretty crazy. Thats enough for me to check it out. No Greater Love is a shallow, dull and flat out dumb film about what people should not do. It has a 6.0 on IMDB which is just bizarre.
The film is about a married couple (Jeff and Heather) who one day Heather just leaves her husband and newborn child. She is missing for 10 years and presumed dead. 10 years later Jeff has moved on and is about to propose to his new girlfriend Katie. Jeff's son goes to a day camp and finds out the one person who works there is his mother Heather whom he does not know is his his mother. Eventually Jeff and Heather meet again. Instead of Jeff being mad like any normal person would be he is very forgiving. This is where I got angry at this film. Jeff and Katie break up because apparently he in still love with the woman who betrayed him and left him to singly raise their kid. Poor Katie tried was so nice in this film trying to be a good would be stepmother and a good girlfriend and she gets the shaft by her would be husband. Katie disappears from the film. Its pretty sad how this film treats her. The rest of the film is mainly Jeff and Heather going back and fourth arguing about her new religious beliefs.
I wonder what the message of this film is. Screw the people who love you and love the ones who hurt you? If you vanish for a decade everyone will easily forgive and forget. To me Heather was the villain of the film and she gets the happy ending. This movie just really pissed me off. There is nothing good or redeemable about this film. I have never seen a worse drama of this type.
And the cherry on top. The DVD has a quote saying Powerful by the American Family Association which is a certified hate group!