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Get a sick bag ready as we take a look at the most nauseating scenes ever.
Ivor the Invisible (2001)
Can you say "unlikable"?
I remember watching this back on Christmas 2001, and after viewing it again....
Ivor is SUCH an unlikable character, causing mischief and has probably sent John and his family to prison!
Ivor has no redeeming qualities what do ever and learns nothing!
Also, every time Ivor "speaks", we get an annoying sci-fi like noise, which gets irritating after a while.
The animation is good, if you're familar with the films based on Raymond Briggs' stories.
The films ends on such a down note. That was nice for Christmas viewing, was it?
Just stick with The Snowman and Father Christmas.
Sonic Live in Sydney (2011)
Ugh, this show is BAD!!! The voice acting is terrible! Tails isn't too bad, but Sonic is AWFUL! His voice actress does a terrible American accent that slips back into Aussie. Sally has got a Southern accent for some reason. Robotnik's voice actor is actually good, sounding a lot like Long John Baldry. But there is one problem: Robotnik is in love with Sally.
Ugh, what was the writer smoking? Ugh, and the songs are hideous! The dialogue just makes you wanna stop listening after 5 minutes. However, if you listen to the whole 25 minutes, like I did, then we deserve a medal.
A Voice from the Dark (2019)
I love audioplays, they're also easier to make than going on location and having major problems, which was what the cast of this play suffered from on the other Anniversary movies. A simple story of our heroes entering a haunted house and terrible things happen.
The acting is never great on any internet movie, but their voice acting in this is pretty good. Also we have pictures of each character when they speak appear on screen, whereas any other audioplay, you just look at a blank screen and have to guess who's talking.
The jokes however are hot and miss, we get funny ones like Hagan abusing her minion, and we get some lame pop culture jokes. Internet reviewers are not professional comedians and have never learned to write or do comedy which is why the jokes are usually so awful.
However, we do get a nice "take that" to Channel Awesome.
Overall, this play was just okay. It is better than the other Anniversary specials.
Fifty Shades of Bruce
Originally going to be a fake "how to" guide, Bruce had a "What if" idea. What if he did a movie with Richard Gere and Renee Zellweger?
It is almost like fan fiction, but Bruce has written himself as the John Sue.
Throughout the story, Bruce studies his role by joining a Gentleman's Club and goes on a night in Vegas with Richard and a sleazy ladies' man with unsuccessful results.
Bruce then discovers that someone on his new movie wants to get rid of him and why.
He also meets Liz Taylor and Jack Nicholson (Ted Raimi doing a bad impression of him).
Bruce fans will have fun pointing out the Evil Dead references and hearing Ted Raimi playing multiple characters. It's a shame that the voice actors for this audioplay are never revealed, but you can spot Ted and Dan Hicks if you know your Bruce movies. For all I know, Lucy Lawless could've played some of the characters.
My only problem with this audioplay is that some of the scenes are just filler. Some scenes drag on a bit such as Bruce writing a back story for his character, and the scenes at the Gentlemen's Club and with Liz Taylor drag on a bit. Also a scene where Bruce gets caught by security at an airport did to having a recordable pen. Which plays footage of him having a diahhrea attack sounds ripped off (pun intended) from Naked Gun.
But Bruce's ever so good one liners and the voice acting are on top form, plus it shows you how much being an actor sucks. You might learn something from this audioplay.
Bruce fans should check it out on YouTube, but it is so damn long, so make sure you have a lot of time. Despite that, this is pretty groovy. 😣 Sigh, I know....
My Super Ex-Girlfriend (2006)
My Super Unlikable Female Lead
Jenny is a horrible person! She makes the movie really difficult to sit through. She is also VERY abusive! She not only caused Matt to lose his job, but also TRIES TO KILL HIM AND AN INNOCENT GIRL BY THROWING A SHARK INTO HIS APARTMENT! WOW! Later in the film, when she ends her fued with Matt, she says "That's why I didn't kill you."
GRR! 😠 Very rarely I watch a film that makes me angry, and this is on the top five, along with "Mr Woodcock" and "The Martins".
I remember watching the Mario cartoons in the early 90s. They're not bad, but they haven't aged well. The animation is dodgy and plagued by continuity errors. The sound mixing is poor on some episodes, not all of them, mind you. The music is so loud, that you can't hear the dialogue. And the songs. Dear God, the songs are HORRIBLE! They're sung with really screechy cartoony voices that makes it seen like a bad X Factor audition. However, the stories aren't too bad, it is true to the games, and it's nice to hear Mario speak in his Brooklyn accent, instead of his stereotypical Italian one. Overall, not bad, but not that great.
The whole movie is only 50 minutes long, that's not a movie. Although, rumour has it that this is an edited version. Next problem is that it is a whole retelling of the first season! Why? They do the same jokes and same dialogue. Also when a new character is introduced, the movie just rushes it and moves on without getting to know them. As for the Dragon ball search, it is rushed too. The gang just happens to find the Dragonballs in the finale all at once! 😕 Erm......
Overall, a waste of time. Only worth watching it you don't wanna sit through the whole of Season 1.
Kenan & Kel: The April Fools (2000)
A good message about the consequences of playing pranks.
Joke responsibly indeed. This episode shows you what happens when you act like a prick. You get your just desserts. Kenan and Kel have fun pranking people rather horribly, that they deserve to end up in a cell. Not only that, but Kenan doesn't end up going to college. Serves him right. One of my favourite episodes of this childhood classic. And a good message for kids.
The people of New York hate the turtles even though they stopped a robbery?
It's like the writers were trying to make this episode as unpleasant as possible. It's not just Clayton who is an a**hole, the people of New York are too. But then again, they're New Yorkers....
In the scene where Clayton humiliates the Turtles on the air, it would been nice if Raphael, the a**hole of the turtles gave him a taste of his own medicine by making fun of him.
And after all the s*** The Turtles go through, do we get a happy ending?
Nope, we get probably one of the worst endings in the show. Clayton doesn't get his comupence, he just walks away and continues to be a c***.
Damn! Guys, this is a kids' show, and you're just gonna leave it like that?
Pretty good for a fan film
Normally I hate shot for shot remakes like Psycho (1998), Carrie (2013) and Beauty and the Beast (2017). But I liked this film because of the ambition; It is just a group of high school students remaking Holy Grail. As a fan film you wonder "How are they going to do the Black Knight scene?", "How are they going to do the killer rabbit scene?" and so on.
It is all achieved with no budget but plenty of home made charm that makes me laugh. The castle scenes were shot inside living rooms with cardboard walls and the village scenes were shot on a farm.
The acting and accents are not the greatest, but not the worst either. Some kids don't even attempt to do an English accent. However, Zac Wilson who played all the John Cleese parts is actually pretty good. He does different accents including French and Scottish (not very well, but not terrible).
The cast recorded a commentary on this film explaining what house each scene was filmed in.
However, footage from the actual Monty Python movie (the animations and battle scene at the end) are used and filmed off a computer, according to the commentary. I would've perfered if they either not used footage from the movie and just used cheap looking Lego models or something, to add to the no budget charm. Or for the God scene, have an actor wear a cotton wool beard and Burger King crown.
Overall, if you want to see High school students reenact the whole of Monty Python and The Holy Grail, this is for you.
What a horrible episode!
The main problem with this episode was that Marge and Homer very openingly admit that that they both cheated on each other. WHAT? And when the episode is over, they're just okay, as if nothing happened. Bulls***! Also what ever happened to Mindy? She became an alcoholic and lost her job. Seriously? Just like that? You're gonna give a minor character the boot? Punishing her for being attractive to Homer? Something that wasn't even her own fault! This episode just makes me feel sick.
The FanFic Critic (2010)
Really does not hold up well
I used to watch this show a few years ago, cos I am a fan fic writer myself. There are some good episodes like "Peggy's Revenge", "Cloud Mows the Lawn", "Timeless Lust" and "Sonichu". But the rest is just Megan screaming at the camera and throwing tantrums over spelling mistakes. I had to turn the volume down most of the time. Plus, having to listen to someone just stare into the camera and read the story to you is just plain boring! "Jack-a-nory", this ain't. (A children's show in the UK).
The best episodes worked because she was with her friend Archangel Assassian. They worked because of the banter between those girls, however, they both had a falling out a few years ago, and Megan said it was for the best. (As someone with a bad friend in the past, I can relate)
Overall, in retrospect, just not a good show. Also, Susan's accent is just cringeworthy. It puts Keanu Reeves to shame.
Very good for YouTube film
Most short films on YouTube are not very good, full of bad acting, bad sound, bad editing, wind blowing in the mic, etc.
Horror fan Roly shows his horror traits with what would happen if one should mess with a Ouija board. A living nightmare filled with backwards voices, flashing imagery, blood running out of the eyes, the sort of horror Uwe Boll tried and failed to do.
Jump scares are also effective. Watch this movie in a small dark room. Trust me.
Well done, Roly! I hope you make another one.
Bad Education (2012)
Lives up to its title
The biggest problem with this show is that it tries WAY too hard to both funny and hip for the kids.
Jack Whitehall is an okay actor, but he tries so hard to humiliate himself to get a cheap laugh. To be honest, some of his jokes work, others don't.
The episode where he asks a farmer "Do all meerkats come from Russia?" is just so cringeworthy.
The students are stereotypes that we have seen in other High School comedies. We have the gay kid, the smart Asian one, the slut, the tough kid and the wannabe rapper.
The show also suffers from really annoying dubstep music, again trying too hard to be cool for the target audience.
Also, the editing......... dear God, the EDITING! It looks like a child edited this. Jokes have to work because of the timing, but when you have sudden jump cuts between comedic scenes, it doesn't work.
But the number one thing I hate about this show is Fraser.
I HATE THIS CHARACTER WITH A PASSION!
I get that the joke is that he tries too hard to be cool and fails everytime, but he is just not funny. You can't have a character suddenly shouting "REWIND!" and "TOP BANTER!" and expect it to be funny. Its like a child tugging at his or her's parents clothes and saying "Look at me!"
This show is like Jack Whitehall's stand up; Only funny in small doses.
Not the best of the Ninja Eliminator films
The first 3 movies worked because they were made by RKSS, so they knew what they wanted to do with them. Here, it's given to someone else and it doesn't work, but they don't know the style of it.
Another problem is that it is too long. The key to making a fake movie trailer is to make it 2,3 or 4 minutes. Here, it lasts for 8 minutes.
RKSS do have a cameo in this film, but really they should've made the fourth movie. If there is ever going to be a fifth movie, they should do it.
A Wonderful Kung Fu spoof!
After watching RKSS' "Turbo Kid" and loving the hell out of it, I discovered RKSS' YouTube channel. I've watched "Le Bagman" which I thought was funny, "Total Fury" and this gem!
A spoof on bad 70's Kung Fu movies, we have the Gold Ninja, a ninja cop whose girlfriend gets kidnapped by an evil ninja leader, and he has to find the Ninja Crystal to get her back.
The acting, dubbing, fight scenes and cinematography are all wonderfully bad. All the ninjas appear to be wearing T-shirts on their heads, you can also see the labels.
We also get awesomely bad dialogue like "I will kill you until you die!"
One favourite scene of mine is when the Gold Ninja uses his flute to make his ninja dog appear out of thin air to attack someone. Complete with the dog wagging his tail as he does this.
The best comedy are usual intentionally bad ones.
I have subscribed to RKSS' channel. If you love "Turbo Kid", you should do the same.
I hope they don't get pigeonholed into just making the same movies over and over again, though. But if Peter Jackson went from doing gory low budget B movies to Oscar winning epics, I'm sure RKSS could do the same.
Icons of Horror 2 (2016)
Why is Harley Quinn in this?
Obviously it's really Trent's fan films where horror characters fight each other and edited together to make a plot. But every scene is fight scene, fight scene, fight scene and fight scene.
The acting is hokey. The guy playing Herbert West is out of character. West is supposed to be this weird, kooky anti-social character. but in this, he acts like a normal guy. Its like the actor hadn't seen Re-Animator.
Dr Lecter also sucks. He looks and sounds nothing like Sir Hopkins and he just says the exact same lines from Silence of the Lambs.
Darkman is also a waste. He's a bad guy? And what can he do again? Oh yeah, DISGUISE HIMSELF INTO OTHER PEOPLE.
And the Creeper only appears at the start of the film and never appears again
And yes, why is Harley Quinn in this? She is not even a horror character. "Icons of Horror" INDEED! She doesn't even have a Brooklyn accent.
Yes, The Punisher is in this, for some reason. Cobra Commander was in the last film and Umbrella joining forces with Cobra is not a bad idea.
I will give this a 2, because the concept is interesting. It's just a shame that it's not done 100%.
Why was he successful again?
I had seen Johnny interviewed in the series "I Love 1970's". He was quite funny telling the stories about being beaten up by a lightsabre and eating too many packets of Space Dust.
But as a stand up......ugh.
He just talks about something at first, then he gets angry about something else and then starts shouting for no reason.
And people find that funny.
And that's what this feature is all about. Everyone is all shouting and arguing and being really horrible to each other. It's mean spirited and unfunny. Much like "Vaccuming Completely Nude in Paradise", it is just people shouting and getting angry with each other in EVERY BLOODY SCENE!
And the worst part? It never stops.
Also, not a single laugh to be had.
As someone who had a fantastic diet of British comedy since childhood, Johnny Vegas and Ricky Gervais are just people I don't get. And I also don't get why people like them.
Professor Juice (2014)
Gets irritating fast
The big problem with Rosie Caddick is that she can't go a minute without doing funny voices and pulling faces. You want her to get on with the review, but she spends way too much time doing her shtick that you just give up on her completely.
She also does pointless sketches that go nowhere and have nothing to do with the review.
Imagine if Siskel and Ebert reviewed a movie and they kept on doing funny voices and pulling faces throughout the whole thing.
I tried to watch episodes of Buddy Games, but when you have Rosie going:
"Hi, I'm Rosie AND I'M DOING A FUNNY VOICE!"
You know when you have that friend who keeps telling the same joke over and over and you're like "Okay, that's enough!"
Fun doc on a fun movie
Turbo Kid is a love letter to 80's B Movies and was made by 80's kids, RKSS.
I had never heard of Turbo Kid until I saw "Good Bad Flicks" top 10 films of 2015. One of these films he put on his list was this one.
I saw the trailer and thought it looked awesome and then I saw the movie online and I flippin' loved it!
This doc is interesting. We learn about RKSS, who have their own YouTube channel and have made short films for over a decade. I recommend that channel. The "Ninja Eliminator" movies are SO FUNNY!
They talk about "T is for Turbo" which was an entry for the "ABC's of Death" contest and they didn't win. But if you watch that short, you can see the similarities.
Their movies of course have a lot of gore and this movie is no exception. Aaron Jeffrey said "When I read the script, I thought 'That's a lot of gore'."
Of course we see the puppets made for the gore.
Then they talk about how cold it was filming in Canada and the fight scenes.
The doc ends with the cast and crew going to the Sundance festival.
We see clips of their short films and scenes from them later referenced in Turbo Kid.
Overall, I loved Turbo Kid and RKSS' shorts. Roll on Turbo Kid 2.
Princess Nikki (2006)
Nikki has taught us one good thing......
.......and that's how not to be a human being. She's a terrible person; she's rude, arrogant, whiny, spoilt, lazy, talentless, selfish and....... there is absolutely nothing good to say about her AT ALL. She's like a character from a sitcom. In sitcoms, the main characters are usually written as horrible people like Basil Fawlty, Cartman, Homer Simpson, Blackadder and Richie and Eddie. But Nikki is a real person, unfortunately.
What I like about this show is that it makes fun of her. And there's nothing better than seeing a horrible person get made fun of. Professional workers make fun her and her arrogance and the viewer just shakes their head in disgust. Parents say "Thank God she's not MY daughter."
Nikki wants credit for things she didn't do very well. "I did a 10/10 on farming." But her employers say the opposite.
I'm not a fan of Gordon Ramsey, but I would like to see Nikki on his show. He would have a field day.
Sonic Boom: The Biggest Fan (2016)
Not starring Chris-Chan, says the makers of this show..........
I never watched this show, but this episode caught my attention because it was rumoured that Mark the number one fan was based on Chris-Chan.
The writers of this show denied it, but there are a lot of similarities between Chris and Mark:
. The Orange Soda........... (shudder)...... if you know Chris, you know what I'm talking about.
. Mark making a reference to Sonic's arms being blue, Chris got angry when Sonic Boom made his arms blue and not flesh coloured, in his strange Chris-Chan way.
. Mark writes Sonic fan fiction that isn't family friendly.
The only things that Mark are missing are a striped jumper and a Southern accent.
Whether Mark is Autistic is a mystery.
The episode does a good job spoofing "Misery", only Mark didn't break Sonic's legs with a sledgehammer.
I didn't like the "Secret of the Garbage" joke, it wasn't funny. Also in this show, Knuckles' re-design and he is an idiot.
Chris, say what you want about Sonic's arms, but's it's Knuckles that's the biggest problem with Sonic Boom.
It would've been nice at the end of the episode that Mark broke down and cried, since he has no friends and considers Sonic one, despite not really knowing him. And Sonic and his friends would've gave Mark a heart-to-heart and gave a message to kids about not being obsessed with someone you don't really know.
Overall, I liked this episode.
Wonder has Chris seen this?
Reconstructing Edward (2017)
Resurrecting Evil Ed
As we all know, once the movie was completed and released, it just died. It had no big names and the cast and crew either never worked again, or just did very little TV and film work.
However, Goran Lundstrom went on to do Special Make up Effects for Star Wars, X-Men, Harry Potter, Narnia and even Little Britain. Kaj Stevenman became a Visual effects creator for films like Underwolrd Awakening.
In this featurette, Director Anders and editor Doc open a wardrobe and take out a role of film from Ed's original cut and also the artwork.
Goran shows us the fridge monster he created, this was actually the second model he made, due to the original fridge monster looking awful.
Doc then re-edits the footage for the Special "Ed-ition", including the lost balcony scene and a montage of Edward editing the violent films.
Jim Friedman returns to voice Edward for the balcony scene. If you watch the Special Ed-ition, in the balcony scene, Ed sounds much older.
Overall, a nice featurette on a movie that vanished on release, and then brought back to life by Arrow Video.
Lost in Brainland (2017)
This 3 hour doc is okay, but yeah, much like "The Story of Hellraiser", it is too damn long. So it does get really boring at times. But at times it gets really interesting. It would've been nice if it was shorten to 90 minutes or 2 hours.
You learn interesting things like the hospital climax was not in the script, the film originally ended with Ed being taken off to hospital.
A radio station in Sweden called "Radio Bandit" an English speaking station did the dubbing. The guy who voiced Ed is in this doc. Shame they didn't get Bill Mosely though.
The worst person being interviewed is the actress who played Mel. All she says is "Oh, I don't remember" in a jokey way.
Speaking of the interviews, when someone's name comes on, their occupation doesn't. So it can get confusing.
We also see some YouTube videos of people reviewing this movie.
Johan said he was recognised at a McDonald's and Per said that his son plays the "Rest in Pieces" scene over and over on YouTube.
An okay doc, but better editing would've sufficed.
Yes, I have seen the 45 minute cut. It's okay, but the 3 hour one has more interesting detail.
Mortal Kombat: Conquest (1998)
Mortal Kombat: Borefest
I loved the first movie, hated the second. Heard about this show, but never saw it before. I found this in Poundland. The disc had five episodes.
I watched it and my God, it was dull!
It was talking and talking and talking and talking!
And when it does get to the fight scenes, even they're boring!
The acting is lame and the dire-logue is cringeworthy. Very Saturday cartoonish. Plus this is set 500 years before the events of the first movie and we have characters saying "Bathroom break" and "This sucks".
They keep using the same shot from the first movie where we have the outside of the temple. You can tell it is from the first movie because we can see Liu Kang and his Grandpa in the background as clear as day. Why not digitally remove them?
Sub-Zero's costume and Shao Kahn's helmet are so cheep looking due to the show's low budget.
Apart from Tracy Douglas' nude scene from the fourth episode, I can't think of anything good from this show.
And much like the movies, there is no gore. Boo.......
If another MK series is made, deliver on the gore please. Maybe the directors of "Turbo Kid" might do a reboot, hopefully.