Helena : First I eat. Then we fight.
Siobhan Sadler : Please say something.
Helena : Now we fight.
Siobhan Sadler : I'm not going to fight you, Helena. You're pregnant.
Helena : Why is everyone so worried about my baby?
Siobhan Sadler : Why don't you tell me how you plan to raise this child?
Helena : I will find my boyfriend.
Siobhan Sadler : I didn't know you had a boyfriend.
Helena : He is named Jesse. Together we will drive tow trucks and make a home for our babies.
Cosima Niehaus : [Not wearing her glasses and disguised as Alison, Cosima runs into someone under a "Success is being yourself" sign] Sorry, dude.
Cosima Niehaus : Felix, I can't see anything.
Felix Dawkins : Oh, Jesus Christ, you need to relax, okay? I know Alison's got a cactus up her arse, but you're over-clenching.
Alison Hendrix : Holy freaking Christmas cake!
Alison Hendrix : Adjusting the district boundaries to exclude Bailey Downs is not the family-first option. As school trustee candidate and a mother of two, I am... I am... I am missing a card.
Alison Hendrix : [gets at a text on her mobile] Cosima needs my pee.
[Scott discreetly shows Rachel that he has Duncan's copy of The Island of Dr. Moreau]
Rachel Duncan : [pointing to the game Scott was playing] A... gricola.
Delphine Cormier : What? What is it?
Scott : Uh, board game. Medieval farm building.
Delphine Cormier : Oh.
Rachel Duncan : [to Scott] Teach.
Delphine Cormier : [amused] Medieval farm building?
Rachel Duncan : I'm so... bored.
Scott : [teaching Rachel the board game Agricola as a cover for a discreet meeting] Okay, you're a medieval farmer. Each turn you get two choices to build your farm - one for you and one for your spouse. You can build fences, plant crops, have children.
Rachel Duncan : [bored] Not seriously.
Scott : Oh yes. This is how we do it, Rachel. Anyone comes in, we're farm building. Now, there are 14 game rounds in six stages, with a harvest at the end of each stage...
[disguised as Alison and improvising a candidate speech without her glasses]
Cosima Niehaus : I've been hearing a lot of people talk today about, um, family values. And in my opinion the most important family value is, um, accepting your family for who they are. Uh, but that doesn't mean coloring inside the lines. Because kids do that. That's their gift. And... and as a lesbian...
[the crowd gasps and Felix sighs]
Cosima Niehaus : ...supporter, and an LGBTQ...
Felix Dawkins : [Alison arrives and joins Felix offstage] Oh, my God. Thank god you're here.
Cosima Niehaus : I... I can't color inside the lines.
Alison Hendrix : I had my speech so ready.
Connie Hendrix : You must be right about one thing. I was duped at I.V.F. That donor was supposed to be exclusive.
[referring to Cosima]
Connie Hendrix : But clearly that girl's mother was given some, too. Oh, that would make you her half-sister, darling. A clone is something else entirely.
Alison Hendrix : You're right, that must be it.
Connie Hendrix : What a bizarre coincidence. Hmm. But if you want to keep seeing her, why don't you bring her to the club?
Alison Hendrix : [pretends to cough] Sorry, parents. Something Marci Coates said just got stuck in my throat.
Jason Kellerman : Hey! There you are. I think I just sweet talked your mom into a sale.
Cosima Niehaus : [disguised as Alison and trying to find the women's lavatory without her glasses] Uh, that's good?
Jason Kellerman : I think I talked myself into something sweet, too.
Cosima Niehaus : What's that?
Jason Kellerman : This, Ali.
[grabs Cosima and gives her a long, passionate kiss]
Cosima Niehaus : [shocked] I need to pee.
Scott : [explaining the game Agricola to Rachel] If you don't have any children you can only take two actions.
Rachel Duncan : You have my...
Scott : Book?
Rachel Duncan : Book.
Scott : No.
Rachel Duncan : Yes.
Scott : Not your book.
Rachel Duncan : My... my... my father... our... se-secret language.
Scott : He didn't leave it for you, did he?
Rachel Duncan : Who, then?