"Smallville" Escape (TV Episode 2010) Poster

(TV Series)


Erica Durance: Lois Lane, Silver Banshee



  • Lois Lane : [sees Oliver and Chloe]  Hey guys! Come here. Sit with us.

    Clark Kent : [speaking to Chloe]  Quiet weekend at home, huh?

    Chloe Sullivan : Trust me, we had no idea the two of you would be here.

    Lois Lane : And we had no idea there was even a "you two," which I think is perfect. I think fate has brought us together.

    Oliver Queen : Well it's ah...

    [everyone exchanges awkward looks] 

    Oliver Queen : It's a little less fate, actually.

    Chloe Sullivan : More fame.

    Oliver Queen : [agreeing with Chloe]  Fame.

    Chloe Sullivan : This is so far off the beaten path that even the society pages couldn't find Star City's most eligible bachelor here.

    Lois Lane : You mean *ex-bachelor*.

    Chloe Sullivan : Okay, enough about that. How did you guys manage to find the road less traveled?

    Clark Kent : Well, I found their brochure at the apartment. I figured Lois wanted to come here.

    Lois Lane : What brochure?

    Chloe Sullivan : That wasn't Lois' brochure, Clark. That was mine.

    [awkward looks are again exchanged] 

    Clark Kent : How was I supposed to know that Oliver...?

    Chloe Sullivan : You weren't. That's the point.

    Oliver Queen : [Clark looks over at Oliver for help]  Oh, don't look at me. I learned long ago not to assume what belongs to who in that apartment. You gotta use context clues.

    Lois Lane : Yeah, speaking of clues let's talk about Mr. Green, in the bedroom, with my cousin.

    Oliver Queen : There it is.

    Clark Kent : Lois, I think they came here for brunch.

    Lois Lane : Good point.

    [smiles some what threateningly at Chloe] 

    Lois Lane : Look Chloe, there's food.

    Chloe Sullivan : [Lois grabs Chloe by the arm and drags her outside]  Woah!

    Oliver Queen : [Clark and Oliver are at a loss for words]  There's little jellies.

  • Clark Kent : [singing in the shower]  I can't tell you, Lois.

    [Chloe, possessed by the Silver Banshee enters, wearing only a towel. Clark throws back the shower curtain] 

    Clark Kent : Chloe?

    [quickly wraps himself up in the shower curtain] 

    Clark Kent : What are you doing in here?

    Chloe Sullivan : Well, I thought I would join you.

    [drops her towel] 

    Clark Kent : [instantly averts his eyes]  Yeah, I can see that.

    [grabs a towel] 

    Clark Kent : At least, I'm trying not to see that. Um... you know, I'm done here, so the shower is yours.

    [grabs another towel and tries to cover Chloe up with out actually looking at her] 

    Clark Kent : Chloe, how much wine did you have to drink at dinner?

    Chloe Sullivan : Why? You wanna share another bottle?

    [moves in very close to Clark forcing him to drop his towel] 

    Chloe Sullivan : Or we could just go for a moonlit walk in the woods.

    Clark Kent : I don't think that Oliver would appreciate it.

    Lois Lane : [Lois enters the bathroom dressed up like a scottish lass complete with kilt and is holding a bottle of bubble bath]  Okay I just...

    Clark Kent : [shocked at Lois' attire yet completely entagled with a naked Chloe]  Lois?

    Lois Lane : Oh, my God.

    Clark Kent : I can explain this, sort of.

    [tries to get free from Chloe but she won't let him go] 

    Clark Kent : Chloe?

    Lois Lane : Shh. You do that. Try to explain it over breakfast maybe next century.

    [looks her bubble bath] 

    Lois Lane : This, I won't be needing.

    [hands it to Chloe and as their hands touch the Silver Banshee transfers to Lois and leaves the room] 

    Clark Kent : Lois?

    Clark Kent : [Chloe faints and Clark catches her]  Chloe. Chloe? Chloe?

    Chloe Sullivan : [Chloe wakes up and realizes they are both naked]  Clark? What are you doing?

    Clark Kent : What are *you* doing?

    Chloe Sullivan : Where are my clothes?

    Clark Kent : I don't know.

    Chloe Sullivan : What's going on?

    [shoves the bubble bath into Clark's hands and runs out of the room] 

  • Maggie McDougal : [after Lois accidentally scratches a painting]  If you ask me, great-great-great-uncle Bevan had it coming.

    Lois Lane : So, what did he do to deserve getting his face scratched off?

    Maggie McDougal : Usurped his sister Siobhan's birthright, took her crown and castle, and then killed her.

    Lois Lane : For a country that prides itself on men wearing skirts, you'd think they'd be a little more progressive than that.

  • Chloe Sullivan : Oliver and I are not a couple.

    Lois Lane : Okay, sure. Then what are you?

    Chloe Sullivan : We're having fun. And we're not complicating things by using labels and definitions.

    Lois Lane : This is a relationship, Chloe, not a spelling bee.

    Chloe Sullivan : Look, I'm glad that you have found someone that makes you happy, but we're not all cut out for coupledom. And with Ollie, I don't have to worry about that, okay? We're no flowers. We're no presents, no pressure, no strings.

    [Lois opens her mouth] 

    Chloe Sullivan : And with you, we're no comment.

  • Lois Lane : I know it's called a bed and breakfast, but missing dinner is a definite bust. I'm starving. And I already ate the granola bar that's been at the bottom of my bag since... I don't know when.

    Clark Kent : Lois, we wouldn't be late if we hadn't driven 40 miles out of our way to see the world's largest ball of yarn.

    Lois Lane : You'll thank me later.

  • Lois Lane : Clark, I don't care how bad it is. I survived a tent in Guadalajara. I can handle a...

    [seeing the room spruced up] 

    Lois Lane : ...soggy room.

    Clark Kent : Turns out the leak wasn't as bad as she said it was. I fixed the pipe.

    Lois Lane : Clark Kent, my hero.

  • Lois Lane : [surprised to see Chloe and Oliver at the same B&B]  Twist.

  • Lois Lane : How can you be so "eh" about this? This is Chloe and Oliver, together, here. Did you know they were dating?

    Clark Kent : Well...

    Lois Lane : No, of course you didn't. I mean, *I* didn't even know they were dating.

  • Lois Lane : I know that I ran a verbal marathon last night and then I fell asleep, but... I promise, tonight is about the two of us.

    Clark Kent : I waited for you to get ready for three hours. If it means being with you, I can wait forever.

    Lois Lane : Forever's a long time.

  • Lois Lane : [pushing Clark out of their room]  Just give me ten minutes. Then you'll get a surprise.

    Clark Kent : Something tells me you'll never stop surprising me, Lois.

    [they kiss, then she closes the door in his face] 

    Lois Lane : Ten minutes.

  • Lois Lane : [returning to the Talon]  Well, as incredible as that R&R attempt was, I think we should skip the old B&Bs for a while.

    Clark Kent : Lois, for our first weekend away together, it could have been worse.

    Lois Lane : I was possessed by a 300 year old Scottish banshee and I almost killed you, Clark.

    Clark Kent : But we did get to see the world's largest ball of yarn. That made the whole trip worthwhile.

    Lois Lane : All thanks to my stellar sense of direction. Let's face it, Clark, without me, you'd still be lost.

  • Zod : [calling on the encrypted phone Clark uses as the Blur]  Hello, Lois.

    Lois Lane : It's you. I was wondering, hoping, that you'd call again.

    Zod : I need your help.

    Lois Lane : Anything.

    Zod : I need you to get information on Tess Mercer.

    Lois Lane : Well, you've come to the right girl. Just give me the question. I'll find you an answer. No matter what it takes, I'll do it. I wanna help. I will get you the information you need.

    Zod : But you can't tell anyone about it. Promise me you won't.

    Lois Lane : [glancing at Clark]  I promise.

    Zod : I wouldn't ask, Lois, if it weren't a matter of life or death.

  • Lois Lane : [her phone buzzes while she and Clark kiss]  Just let it go to voicemail.

    Clark Kent : Yeah, well, um, why don't you answer it, Lois? What if it's important?

    Lois Lane : Okay. A little privacy, please?

    Clark Kent : Just pretend I'm not here.

    Lois Lane : I can't do that.

    Clark Kent : Well, I guess I'll just have to get used to sharing you with the world.

  • Oliver Queen : Who told Chloe to go walk in the woods, anyway? Was it Hansel and Gretel, do you suppose?

    Silver Banshee : It's not much farther.

    Oliver Queen : Well, I hope she left a trail of breadcrumbs, 'cause if she didn't, we might never find our way out of here.

    Silver Banshee : Oh, I'll be leaving these woods.

    [pushing him up against a tree] 

    Silver Banshee : But you won't.

  • Oliver Queen : Well, Lois... you got any bagpipes to go with that outfit there, lassie? That means you guys are having a little fun. It's cute. Uh, listen, I-I'm looking for Chloe. She took a walk a while ago, she hasn't returned, and I'm getting a little worried about her.

    Silver Banshee : I was just with her, actually.

    Oliver Queen : You were? Okay.


    Oliver Queen : Oh, right. Yeah, okay. So, just lay it on me.

    Silver Banshee : Why don't I take you to see Chloe instead? You will never win a woman's heart by waiting for her to come to you.

  • Lois Lane : [wearing a sexy nightgown]  Too much?

    Clark Kent : You're perfect.

  • Maggie McDougal : According to legend, Siobhan felt so robbed of her life on earth, she wanted to return from the underworld and live again. She was granted her wish, at a price. Since she was betrayed by a man, she was cursed to kill men. Any that crossed her path.

    Lois Lane : Oh, murder, misogyny, and mayhem. I can see why you left that out of the brochure.

  • Maggie McDougal : How about a cup of tea while you wait for your boyfriend?

    Lois Lane : [glancing at a couple nearby necking]  How about... we just take Mr. and Mrs. PDA's room, because, you know, they obviously don't need it?

    Maggie McDougal : [nervously]  Um...

    Lois Lane : Just kidding.

    Maggie McDougal : Oh.

    Lois Lane : I'll go check on Clark. He is used to baling hay, but I'm sure he's just bailing buckets to stay afloat.

  • Maggie McDougal : Yes, can I help you?

    Lois Lane : Hey.

    Clark Kent : Sorry about that. Uh, we're late. The reservation's under Kent.

    Maggie McDougal : Oh, I apologize, but thanks to the storm, the room you reserved sprang a leak. I tried to call, but the line wouldn't connect. Cell reception is horrible around here.

    Clark Kent : [Lois subtly hits him]  Well, that's f-fine. We'll, um, take any room that you have available.

    Maggie McDougal : Uh, there... isn't one. Before I realized the pipe had burst, I gave the last room away.

    Lois Lane : Okay, well, um...

    [checking the sign-in log] 

    Lois Lane : ...let's, uh, hope that, uh, Mr. and Mrs. Green didn't quite finish unpacking, because the only inn they're gonna be staying at is called Holiday.

  • Lois Lane : Ah, perfect timing. Articles are in, phone calls have been returned, and I am officially ready for our magical mystery weekend.

    Clark Kent : That's great, so let's escape before Randall sends you on an assignment. Where's your bag?

    Lois Lane : Well, since you insisted on being a man of secrets, I had to cover all my bases.

    [showing him three different suitcases] 

    Lois Lane : There's a snow angel, surfer girl, city chic.

    Clark Kent : How about countryside bed and breakfast?

    Lois Lane : Good choice. But since I'm assuming you don't mean the French countryside...

    Clark Kent : No. It's kind of Scottish. Some place called the McDougal Inn.

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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