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"Saturday Night Live" Will Ferrell/Queens of the Stone Age (TV Episode 2005) Poster

Quotes

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Sean Connery: [the category is "Japan-US Relations"] I'll take "Jap anus relations" for $200.

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Alex Trebek: Dr. Cosby, would you like to pick a category?

Bill Cosby: That's Doctor William H. Cosby, Junior, E.D.D. WHoa!

Alex Trebek: Okay. Would you like to pick a category?

Bill Cosby: No I would not!

Alex Trebek: Okay, Mr. Connery.

Sean Connery: I'll take Jap Anus Relations for 200...

[laughter]

Alex Trebek: [board flashes "JAPAN US RELATIONS", Trebek looks at the board in consternation] I'm sorry, that's Japan U.S. Relations, that's just awful and you know it.

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Alex Trebek: [the category is "The Letter that comes after "B"] The word cat would be found under this letter in the dictionary.

[Sean Connery buzzes in]

Alex Trebek: . Sean Connery?

Sean Connery: I believe you'd find that in the R section.

Alex Trebek: No, not in the "R's".

Sean Connery: Not in the "R's"? That's not what your mother said.

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Sean Connery: Well, well, well, Trebek, fancy seeing you again. It's been a while.

Alex Trebek: Not long enough.

Sean Connery: That's not what your mother said last night.

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Alex Trebek: Mr. Connery, let's see what you wrote.

[the board displays 0+0-0=0]

Alex Trebek: Zero plus zero minus zero equals zero. I think we have a winner, those are numbers, a first grader would know that! I can't believe it! Well, that's all the time we have...

Sean Connery: Oh, uh, don't ya want to see what I wagered, Trebek?

Alex Trebek: Do I? You promise me it's still a number?

Sean Connery: Absolutely. Friend.

Alex Trebek: Sure.

Sean Connery: [0+0-0=0 becomes "POOP,p+0-0=p on board] It is a number! Number 2, Get it?

[Sean Connery starts laughing, eventually dopeslaps Trebek]

Alex Trebek: Okay, that's it, I quit, once and for all, really. Good night.

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[introducing the Double Jeopardy categories]

Alex Trebek: "Japan US Relations." I have no idea what that category is doing up there.

Sean Connery: I had relations this morning, Trebek. Hope we didn't wake you; your mother's a screamer.

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