The Warwick family are unknowingly being filmed for a new reality show. Problem is, they're boring. So the producer, Mickey Wagner, must add conflict and drama. Their lives begin to unravel with shocking consequences.
In Ventura, CA, Giuseppe Andrews makes movies in his trailer park where he grew up. A former child actor in some big movies (Independence Day, Unstrung Heroes, Never Been Kissed), Giuseppe ... See full summary »
A budding young scientist lad is caught by his mom checking out the lady across the way with his telescope, whereupon she lectures him on the evils of women. Twenty years later and all ... See full summary »
The hapless Ishbo, a philosophical caveman, yearns for more out of life than sticks, stones, and raw meat. Determined to single-handedly, advance the human race, Ishbo continually irritates his fellow Neanderthals with ridiculous inventions like the toothbrush, the spoon, and pants. The rest of his tribe, including his exasperated parents, write off his absurd gizmos and forward thinking ideas as the ravings of an idiot, something that doesn't help his efforts to impress the beautiful Fardart, the cave girl he loves from afar. Fardart only has eyes for Ishbo's studly but dimwitted brother, Thudnik. As if things couldn't get any worse, the enemy tribe on the other side of the hill is readying for war. Will Ishbo ever win Fardart's love? Can he possibly survive a man-eating wooly mammoth or a man-hating tribe of beautiful but deadly Amazons? Can he finally pull his species out of the primordial doldrums before he's history?
Makes Caveman, Cavegirl and Year One look like works of genius.
Dawn of Sex, another Poundland purchase (when will I learn?), features blonde Hollywood hottie Ali Larter in sexy cave-woman attire, as well as numerous other babes wearing very little at all—and yet it still proves to be an excruciatingly dull watch thanks to writer/director Adam Rifkin's dreadful laugh-free script, his dire central performance, lousy direction, and woeful special effects. Well done, Rifkin: you've managed make a film loaded with hot women a virtually joyless experience!
Rifkin plays the film's luckless prehistoric 'hero', philosophical forward-thinking caveman Ishbo, who has about as much luck with the women as he does with his crappy inventions: Ishbo is in love with his life-long friend Fardart (Larter), but she is attracted to his much more athletic brother Thudnik (Hayes MacArthur). In one extremely ill-conceived moment, Ishbo accepts defeat and attempts to 'club' (ie., assault and rape) another woman, but winds up killing her instead. Finally, he gets drunk and shags a chimpanzee. And we, the viewers, are supposed to find all of this hilarious and feel empathy towards this pathetic loser!?!
The 'comedy' goes from bad to worse when Fardart is abducted by rival tribe, the Binadraks, and Ishbo embarks on a rescue mission. In a scene obviously written by Rifkin just so that he can frolic with several semi-naked, silicon-enhanced bimbos, Ishbo encounters a tribe of beautiful Amazonians who want him to impregnate them. After having his genitals washed by several of the sexy women, Ishbo is about to get started with the tribe's leader Queen Fallopia (Carol Alt) when his conscience kicks in and he flees to find the love of his life. He should have stayed and lived the life of a stud, however, for when Ishbo finally tries to free Fardart, she refuses to leave, preferring the company of the macho Binadraks. Well done Rifkin: you've succeeded in turning the lovely Larter into a despicable bitch.
Dawn of Sex also features embarrassingly bad performances from once-respectable actors David Carradine, Gary Busey, and Talia Shire, all of whom should have turned the project down and immediately fired their agents, plus an unsurprisingly bad turn from thoroughly unrespectable ex-porn legend Ron Jeremy, who probably isn't as ashamed of this mess as most people would be.
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