Get Thee to a Nunnery -- is that such a good idea?
Mid-80s porn videorig deals with 3 novice nuns on the eve of taking their final vows but manages to be not nearly as tasteless as you could expect. Some spoilers will probably appear in this comment, since the VHS version is long O/P and not likely to show up on DVD anytime soon.
Exploitation begins early, with the novices peeling out of their habits and getting into nighties that look a little improbable for a convent. The 3 leads, Buffy Davis, Keli Richards, and Jen Noxt, are all styled as plain-jane as possible. Without tons of makeup and her much more familiar porn-ho' bravado, Richards will remind you tremendously of the neighbor's sweet, almost-pretty daughter, whom you can always count on for babysitting because she's too shy to have a boyfriend and never goes out. Buffy's astounding development makes it hard to style her down, but the makeup artists come as close as you can get. Noxt's biggest appeal was that she looked like a tall, thin teenage counter girl at a fast food joint, not a porn star, in the first place, so she's perfectly cast here. Tantala Ray is the Mother Superior. (Yes, that's what I said!) The novices drop off to sleep and Buffy has a Bride of Christ fantasy dream that would have been more effective had they put a robe and beard on Francois Papillon. Keli has a nightmare dating back to her days as a drug addict, when she found her boyfriend with another girl (Blake Palmer and Sylvia Benedict, in a film clip from a few years earlier) and ran out into the night, half-stoned, only to be taken advantage of by two bums in an alley.
Buffy and Jen decide to sneak out, for one taste of the wild side before they enlist for life in the Army of God, and they wind up at a sleazy strip bar. Only viewers familiar with the 80s porn scene will appreciate the fact that the second stripper on the stage is none other than Tantala Ray, scoring a double-header role in the picture. As this is a family-friendly database I won't detail her act, but let's just say it involves a whip and some ping pong balls. Personally, I thought she easily outdid the transsexual who provides the first strip number, but both acts are more freak show than erotic.
Meanwhile, back at the convent, Tantala manages to be in two places at once. As Mom Superior, and comforting a still disconsolate Keli, she tells her about a lesbian episode in her own past, which is acted out by Lois Ayres and Cara Lott in another flashback. And down at the strip bar, novices Buffy and Jen are making some brand new friends. Noxt does a decent job of playing a cute, drunk chick, but unlike the real thing, she doesn't throw up on anybody. In the end, only two novices take their final vows.
Pic passed for outrageous in its time, though it has been bypassed, long since, by gonzo and extreme porn. It's really more cute than hot, nowadays. Although the three femme leads were anal scene regulars in their day, Keli provides but a few moments of this activity in "Nasty Habits," Buffy and Jen none at all. I don't even recommend the film to anyone who's not already a major fan of Richards and Noxt, and that is not necessarily for the sexual content. Both women show more acting talent than they usually got to display in their movies. (For Noxt, see also "Cheerleader Academy," where she does quite a good job thespically.)
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