Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town (1970 TV Movie)
Dingle: Wiggle my ears and tickle my toes, methinks I see a baby's nose! It's more than a nose. There's a whole baby attached to it. Better call my brothers! Wingle! Bingle! Tingle! Zingle!
Zingle: What is it, Dingle?
Wingle: It's a baby, Zingle.
Tingle: A baby what, Wingle?
Bingle: A baby baby, Tingle.
Dingle: I like babies, Bingle.
Bingle: Our baby's the best baby of them all, Wingle.
Kris: You better watch out, better not cry, better not pout.
Kris: I'm telling you why!
Kris: 'Cause I came to town. And look what I brought!
[when Santa's reindeer are first introduced]
Narrator: I'll bet you know their names.
Children: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen!
[silhouette of ninth reindeer appears]
Child #2: Don't forget...
[reindeer's nose blinks red, revealing it to be Rudolph]
Narrator: No, that's another story.
Burgermeister Meisterburger: I hate toys! And toys hate me! Either they are going or I am going! And I am certainly not going, Grimsley.
Newscaster: Today, children everywhere are making preparations for an event of world shaking significance: the annual visit of Santa Claus. Informed sources report that legions of junior citizens are making monumental efforts not to cry and not to pout. Meanwhile, letters by the thousands have been flooding postal facilities at the North Pole.
Burgermeister Meisterburger: Stop! In the name of the law! You brats are under arrest! Take them away.
Kris: Don't arrest those children. It was my fault. I gave them the toys.
Burgermeister Meisterburger: You? How dare you! You are obviously a nonconformist and a rebel!
Kris: Me? Rebel?
Burgermeister Meisterburger: Arrest this man immediately!
Kris: [pulls out a toy] For you.
Burgermeister Meisterburger: [sputters] A yo-yo? I love yo-yos! I used to be able to do all kinds of tricks! Ooh wheeeeeeeeee! Hoo hoo hoo hoo!
[plays with the yo-yo]
Grimsley: Excuse me, sir, but you're breaking your own laws.
Burgermeister Meisterburger: What? What are you saying?
Burgermeister Meisterburger: Ooohh, I have been bamboozled! Arrest him! Arrest him!
Winter: You mustn't mind the tree monsters. Their bark is worse than their bite. Ha ha ha ha!
Grimsley: Herr Burgermeister! Herr Burgermeister! Look what was discovered on your front stoop.
Burgermeister Meisterburger: What? What, Grimsley? The milk? The daily paper?
Grimsley: No, sir, a baby.
Burgermeister Meisterburger: Oh, is that all?
[gasps and chokes]
Burgermeister Meisterburger: A *baby*?
Grimsley: And there's a note: "Please, sir, take care of my child and protect him from the dangers of the Mountain of the Whispering Winds. He will be exceptional if only given the love he needs."
Burgermeister Meisterburger: I, Burgermeister Meisterburger, take care of a baby? Outrageous! What's his name?
Grimsley: This is the only clue, sir. It says, "Claus".
Burgermeister Meisterburger: Ah, take the little, uh, baggage to the orphan asylum. That's the proper place for foundlings anyway.
[the baby cries]
Burgermeister Meisterburger: [shouting] GET THAT BRAT OUT OF HERE!
Narrator: So you want to know all about Santa, huh? Best place to start is at the very beginning, when Santa was just a little baby.
Little Girl: You mean Santa was once... a baby?
Narrator: Of course! Everybody has to be a baby at least once in their lives. Now this was years and years ago. Oh, way back.
Jessica: Oh, Mr. Warlock!
Winter: Uh, Winter, please.
Jessica: You must help me stop Kris. Please, use your magic.
Winter: Oh... alas, I've been... disenchanted. I have no more powers. I can't even do card tricks.
Jessica: Oh! That's terrible! What shall we do?
Grimsley: Nobody is going to do anything! You are all under arrest for defying the law and making toys! And for being an accomplice to Public Enemy Number One: Kris Kringle!
Kris: Changing from bad to good's as easy as taking your first step.
Burgermeister Meisterburger: This is outrageous! Toys! Toys everywhere! What sort of criminal is this Kringle, sneaking into houses at night? I hereby decree that all the town's doors and windows be locked tight against this prowler!
Narrator: And that is the story of Santa Claus.
Little Girl: He's so wonderful. Everybody must love him.
Narrator: Well, most everybody. Oh, he's not considered an outlaw any more. But there still are some...
Ebenezer Scrooge: Eh, bah, humbug.
Disgruntled Retailer: Christmas is a bother. The noise, the crowd. I really wish it were outlawed.
Businessman: How can they talk about Santa Claus when there is so much unhappiness in the world?
Narrator: Poor, misguided folks. They missed the whole point. Lot's of unhappiness? Maybe so. But doesn't Santa take a little bit of that unhappiness away? Doesn't a smile on Christmas morning scratch out a tear cried on a sadder day? Not much maybe. But what would happen if we all tried to be like Santa and learned to give as only he can give: of ourselves, our talents, our love and our hearts? Maybe we could all learn Santa's beautiful lesson and maybe there would finally be peace on Earth and good will toward men. Hey, it's getting late, and I've got these letters to deliver. You better be getting home, too. And remember, behave yourselves, because Santa can still look into his magic snowball and see just what you're up to. And now that you know all about him, you can be darn sure that come snow or high water, Santa Claus is comin' to town!
Burgermeister Meisterburger: [singing] It's a difficult responsibility / That you accept from the number one lawmaker, me / Have it known throughout the land from sea to sea / There'll be no more toymakers to the king.
Kris: Watch out for that dolly. She's a hardened criminal, I hear.
Tanta Kringle: A baby! What a splendid idea. He shall live with us and sleep with us and drink warm cocoa with us.
Kris: Look, uh, before you do me in, would you tell your tree friends to let me loose for a second? You see, I have something for you.
Winter: What is this? A trick?
Kris: Oh, no sir, Mr. Warlock. Or, may I call you Winter?
Winter: Mr. Warlock if you please!
Kris: Oh. Well, I managed to save one little toy and I'd like you to have it.
Winter: You wish to give me... a present? A... a toy?
Kris: Yes, sir.
Winter: But, no one ever gives mean old Warlock a toy.
Narrator: Kris made a list of all the children and the toys they wanted. He checked it over once, then checked it over twice. He tried to figure out just who was naughty and who was nice.
Kris: Well, I guess they're all pretty nice.
Jessica: Herr Burgermeister, please, you must set Kris and the little Kringles free.
Burgermeister Meisterburger: [laughing] Set them free? Never!
Jessica: I promise they'll never disturb you again.
Burgermeister Meisterburger: Bah! What good are your promises? Good-bye, good luck, and good riddance.